Hello, I’m Paul Friedman, founder of The Marriage Foundation, and if jealousy is causing trouble in your marriage, you’re not alone in this tough spot. Whether you’re a wife who is tortured by jealousy and probably pushing your husband away, or a husband who gets beyond angry with jealousy and you cannot control it, you will learn that you don’t have to remain its victim. You can overcome this habit no matter how chronic. I’ve worked with so many, hundreds, both men and women, who suffered with and then conquered this destroyer of peace. During the eight years of developing my teachings, and then since 2009 through TMF, I know and I can tell you straight: you can beat it and bring peace back to yourself and your marriage. God loves you, watches over you, and wants you to be happy, and His plan for your marriage doesn’t include jealousy, but you have to learn. At TMF, with our approach, we’ve shown over and over that you don’t need counseling’s long talks or strict rules to get past jealousy—you need your free will, powered up by our SEW technique, to choose unconditional love.
This isn’t just another take on jealousy—it’s a clear path to get rid of it for good. Jealousy is a primitive survival instinct gone too far, a kind of cancer in your mind, rooted in your body, and I’ll show you how to take charge and then heal your marriage with faith and love along the way (Jealousy, as bad as it is, isn’t the marriage killer). No quick fixes or therapy jargon here—just TMF’s proven steps that have saved marriages others thought were done.
Jealousy: A Cancer That Starts in Your Body’s cells
Jealousy isn’t just a passing feeling—it’s a deep, troubling force, a cancer in your mind and body that comes from our basic survival instincts. Long ago, humans had to protect what kept them alive—food, shelter, family—and jealousy was part of that, a reflex innate to the survival instinct, to guard against losing what mattered. In marriage, it shows up as fear: “Will my spouse turn to someone else?” “Am I enough?” These aren’t calm thoughts—they’re your body acting like your life’s on the line. I’ve seen it hit both ways—wives imagining their husbands drifting off, husbands feeling on edge over a wife’s friendly hello—and it grows into mistrust that eats away at your peace. This isn’t your fault; it’s a natural reaction from your body, but you can take control with your willpower from your soul.
Your body tries to run things—tight chest, racing heart, spinning thoughts—until your soul steps up and says, “I’m in charge.” Jealousy’s power comes from that physical pull, taking over your mind unless you decide to break free. The world might say to push it down or fight it out—those are human answers, not God’s. Counseling can make it worse, dragging you through endless talks about why you feel this way, keeping you stuck instead of moving forward. That’s not healing; it’s just more baggage. God’s way is different—He sets you free with love, not blame. His greatest gift is free will and volition. At The Marriage Foundation, we don’t waste time picking apart jealousy; we help you rise above it. It doesn’t have to ruin your marriage—it can be beaten, and your love can grow stronger.
Step One: See Jealousy for What It Is and Take Control with will and determination, and the right tools
The first step is to see jealousy clearly—it’s an old survival trick, not the truth about your marriage. Your body’s in control, stirring up fears like your spouse’s every move is a threat. But God gave you free will, a gift stronger than those instincts, letting you take back the reins. I’ve talked with husbands and wives who felt that change: once they saw jealousy as just their body overreacting, not their heart speaking, they started to feel calmer and ready to choose something better.
Start with prayer—not asking your spouse to change, but asking God to help you, the soul, take charge. Say something simple like, “Lord, show me how to lead my heart and love like You do.” Our marriage resources have prayers like this to get you going—it’s not about completely ignoring your feelings; it’s about stepping up over them. Jealousy might hit you with worries—her smile at someone else, his quick chat with a friend—but your soul, with God’s help, can see past that to peace. God’s working in your marriage, and you’re the one He’s counting on to carry His love, whether you’re the husband or the wife.
Step Two: Break Free from Jealousy with SEW
Jealousy’s hold—tight chest, racing thoughts—won’t just fade; you’ve got to break it loose. Your body’s survival drive keeps it going, running your mind until you, king or queen soul takes over. At TMF, we use our SEW technique, built over years and taught in our women’s course for wives and men’s course for husbands—both starting with a free 3-day trial—to boost your free will and wipe out this cancer. It’s not a quick trick; it’s a real, practical tool rooted in God’s love. Start here https://themarriagefoundation.org/.
Think about those times jealousy takes over—her mentioning a coworker, him laughing with someone else—your body kicks in, making you feel threatened. SEW helps you cut that off: notice the feeling (like that twist in your gut), pray to let it go (“Lord, I give this to You”), and let God’s peace fill you up, feeling it settle in. This isn’t about pretending it doesn’t hurt; it’s about setting your soul free from jealousy’s mess. On our testimonials page, a wife said, “Jealousy had me trapped; SEW let me love him again.” A husband shared, “I stopped worrying about her every move—SEW gave me peace.” You don’t have to stay stuck under this old instinct; God wants you free, and SEW, powered by your free will, makes it happen.
Step Three: Rise Above Jealousy with Unconditional Love
Now comes the big step: love your spouse unconditionally, using your free will to rise above jealousy’s pull. I know it’s hard—jealousy makes you feel like they don’t deserve it, like they’re a danger to you and keeps going with every imaginable fear-based thought. But hear me out—this isn’t about them; it’s about you overcoming and living in God’s love. Unconditional love isn’t weakness; it’s the strongest thing there is, the kind of love God gives us every day. At The Marriage Foundation, we’ve seen it break jealousy’s hold for both husbands and wives—it’s real, not just a nice idea.
Start small—say something to your mind when you feel suspicious, give a gentle touch when doubt creeps in, or hold back when you’d usually ask questions. You’re not saying their actions are okay; you’re honoring God’s plan for your marriage. This love isn’t a reward for them—it’s your way of living out His grace, pushing jealousy out. A husband on our testimonials page said, “Loving her through my jealousy saved us—I’m free now.” A wife added, “I stopped questioning his every move; love healed me.” Your marriage can grow stronger—not because they change, but because you love.
Step Four: Bring Back Peace with Simple Moments Together
Getting past jealousy isn’t just about stopping it—it’s about bringing peace back to your marriage. Being calm and happy, not torn up inside, and peace comes from Love. After breaking free with SEW and choosing unconditional love, start building little moments with your spouse. It doesn’t have to be big stuff—just share a meal, pray together, or laugh over something small. Our marriage resources have ideas like this—maybe sit down to talk about a good memory—each moment helps rebuild peace.
I’ve seen men and women do this—after jealousy faded, they found calm, closeness, and joy again, all because they took the lead with love. It’s not instant; it’s a step-by-step thing, but it works. Watch my talk on our TMF YouTube channel below—I explain how to bring peace back after tough times like jealousy. It’s not just talk; it’s real, and I’ve seen it work over and over. God didn’t make your marriage for fighting—He made it for peace, and you can start that today.
Why Counseling Doesn’t Work—But You Do
Counseling might sound good—figuring out why you’re jealous, making rules to fix it—but it’s a dead end. It keeps you stuck, talking about your feelings while your body’s old instincts keep running the show. At The Marriage Foundation, we don’t go that way—it holds you back instead of lifting you up. A study from Focus on the Family backs this up—love beats talking it out every time, and TMF takes it further.
Counseling says “talk about it”; we say that won’t work. After 8 years of building our women’s course and men’s course—both starting with a free 3-day trial—and saving thousands of marriages, I know your soul, with free will and SEW, beats any therapy. On our testimonials page, a woman wrote, “Counseling kept me stuck on jealousy; TMF showed me how to love instead.” A man said, “I thought I needed help to stop it—TMF showed me I could do it myself.” You’ve got what it takes—no counselor needed.
TMF: Your Path to Peace
Jealousy doesn’t own your marriage—God does, and He’s given you what you need to win. Start with a 3-day free trial of our women’s course if you’re a wife or men’s course if you’re a husband, then just $39.95 a month (our budget payment plan) to keep going—it’s easy, private, and full of faith. You can do this alone or together, and it’ll bring your marriage back to peace. Our testimonials show it—real people, real wins—and you’re next.
With 8 years of work and thousands of marriages saved, I’m sure this path—seeing jealousy for what it is, breaking it with SEW, loving without conditions—works better than anything else. Jealousy’s a cancer, not your truth; with TMF, you’ll beat it.
Beat Jealousy Now: Start our women’s course or men’s course — both begin with a free 3-day trial.