"Hi! I just wanted to let you know I am forever grateful that I came across this website. My husband has told me he’s noticed my changes in responses to situations. He wanted a divorce in December and I was devastated. I started the women’s course immediately and practiced the SEW method every second. I even told my children about it because it’s beneficial to all aspects of life. He told me at the end of January that he doesn’t want a divorce anymore. Since then it’s been great! I can’t even compare it to anything else. I’m so so so happy to have had this opportunity to learn about my biology, the trauma responses I’ve always acted on, the reasons why I react so negatively. The perspective I’ve learned throughout the course is immeasurable. I will recommend this course to everybody I know. It’s beneficial to everybody regardless of marital status, age or gender. The logic and explanation seems like common sense but for me it opened my eyes and heart so much. I feel happier and fee. I have clarity and know my purpose now. I will share and practice all the knowledge I’ve learned for the rest of my life. Thank you so much for all the work and dedication you’ve put into these courses."
Yazmin“One day I will tell my husband how the work you did brought me back to being the love and heart of our family. Best wishes to you and your families! God bless you all“
Jessica L
“Good morning Dear Counselor, I hope you are having a great day! I had another ah ha moment as I see now how even I have the problem with anger due to the drive to survive. Before I just thought it was normal. Now I see it differently. In other areas of my life I find it easier to turn the negative into a positive using the SEW technique.”
Natasha"Hi, I am writing to share some feedback. I am now paying attention the milestones as outlined in the course and I am aware that I have a long way to go. At this time I am really trying to use the SEW on my thoughts which I wasn’t doing previously. Somehow I missed that step my first time through the course and I was only focusing on stopping my outer emotions/ words. In the last week as a couple we have gotten 3 separate compliments on our marriage. The first was a convenience store employee who asked us how long we’d been together and then stated that we have a very positive energy together. The second was a coworker of both of us who wished us “Happy Valentine’s Day to the most in love couple I know”. The third was a friend who joked that they were envious of our relationship and how happy we are together. All of this in the past week. I feel motivated. It’s hard to believe that just 1 year ago the word divorce came up in our conversations. (Of course nobody else knows that. We have kept everything between us) Thank you to the marriage foundation for being there for us/ for me."
Abegail McCoyYes, solo counseling three years ago and couples counseling last year.
Yes, though marriage counseling, psychologist and promises
Yes, we are working on it. We started by going to marriage counseling. Also by working with other men going through similar situations. Over the past several months.
For years now, therapy a year ago.
Yes – we have been in counseling and still ae currently – we have done counseling off and on throughout
Tried reading books like +++++ and How to be a ++++ by ++++ and completed 5 mandatory marriage counselling sessions as required by the Syariah Court (We’re Muslims).
Yes, my wife and I attended couples and individual counseling for about 5 years.
We had some counseling sessions two years ago that were useless.
Some try to solve one problem at a time in therapy. That gets you nowhere because it is dwelling on the problems without moving you forward.Even whoppers like infidelity (most of our clients come to us because of infidelity), as painful as they are, are what woke you up. Now, you don’t need to “understand what happened” as if you were a psych student. You need to get onto solid ground. You don’t need to learn how to “cope” either. You need to know exactly, not theoretically, but exactly, how to move forward into a revitalized marriage that will start filling up with happiness and love. You need to learn how to shift your thinking and rediscover the love and connection that brought you together in the first place, so your lives ahead are filled with joy. We want you to set the bar high. You deserve happiness and love.
Every one of us has flaws and make mistakes. But we don’t need to stay tied to our errors or our spouse’s errors. Love and joy are our birthrights and marriage is the place to experience them. You just need to learn how.It isn’t too late. Some who come to us are already “effectively” separated and a few are literally separated. It doesn’t matter. Your case is undefinable in terms of “can my marriage be saved”. That’s why we have 3-day free trial. Even if you aren’t sure after 3 days there is still a 30-day period where you can get your money back. The guarantee was started by Paul for his live sessions. Have you ever heard of a therapist offering that??The pressures and frustrations you are now feeling will give way to hope and encouragement! Especially the SEW technique, but all our techniques, methods and especially our proven process works like mathematics. You will experience the power you have right away. From the very start you will begin to master your mind. Mastering your mind is basic for happiness. We know, nobody tells us that, but it is true.
Marriage is simple in ways but it is also complex, that is true. But so are many things we do, like driving a car, or your job at work. You can do this, too. True marital success is at your fingertips. But it takes more than your desire and determination. That’s why we guide your marriage healing with truthful knowledge and a proven process, every step of the way. It is not just a course. As soon as you fill out the intake form one of our TMF counselors, trained by Paul will respond with clarity and encouragement.If you have been reading Paul’s articles or watching his YouTube videos you know we mean business about getting results. Mere improvement is not enough for us and shouldn’t be for you. A well understood marriage, with all of its attributes, especially you, means you will know how to have the promises of marriage; ever-increasing happiness and ever-expanding love. You should and can have it. Don’t settle.Our system employs easy to learn techniques and methods which are based upon universal principles of love. You are a human being who can and should expect ever-increasing happiness and ever-expanding love. We KNOW we are intended to be joy-filled and live in love. Soulmates means we are souls. We are not religionists. But love is spiritual.
"Thank you. I’m committed to make the complete change for myself and my marriage. I believe in this training program and later I think I want to join the counselors. I have to say this is by far one of the hardest things I’ve had to go through but I’m growing. I’ll be married 25 years in July so I have a lot to undo, but I’m doing it, something I would have never thought I could do. I appreciate all the help from all the counselors and especially Paul. I wish that some of the counselors would share their success stories about how their marriages changed."
ElwoodOur methodical process does more than just “save” marriages.
If we were as educated about marriage as driving a car nobody would need our videos, books, articles, and courses. Learning how to “drive” marriages will certainly be required in the future. But for now, your current marriage troubles, whether because of infidelity (porn, sexting, an affair), “falling out of love” (you are still soulmates), or anger, it is a wake-up call. That’s what we hear from our clients, sometimes weeks later, and sometimes many years later. They see what they went through as a blessing in disguise. We know it is hard to imagine things ever being the “same”, and we don’t want “the same” for you, anyway. Our courses will give you MUCH BETTER than that.
When you begin to apply what’s in the courses everything starts to become clear. The first results are in the form of calmness, because you will feel confident that our methodical system will work. You may see the light at the end of the tunnel right away. That’s the beauty of our system.
It takes you forward, step by step.
Marriages don’t fix themselves, of course. You will have to do your part, but you will do it knowledgeably.
Keep in mind that marriage is not something that mankind stumbled upon. Marriage is (we are not being “religious”) a loving gift from God. It was always intended to provide us with “above-the-world” joy and love.
We just never learned how to “drive” our marriage. So, think of your marriage as an elegant vehicle designed to carry you in love and joy… But we never learned how. Now, Paul’s discoveries become your map to happiness and love.
Love and happiness are NOT too much to ask for. You got married to be happier every day of your lives, and that is exactly what you should expect. It is reasonable, and we have proven it is reasonable for over 22 years.
When our founder, Paul Friedman, shifted his life to healing marriages he wanted to make sure that everyone could learn about his discoveries and how to use them. Paul was a divorce mediator at that time, and because of his profession he had many therapist friends. But he knew therapists, who are good people who wish to serve others, simply don’t know how to save marriages. So rather than use psychological methods to help his new marriage help clients he followed his ‘correct’ inclinations; to discover marriage’s “construct”, and to understand marriage “mechanically”.
There is a science to marriage. Happiness and love are the primary goals of marriage. Most people never think of the core reasons we get married, but those are the two primary reasons. We want to be married to be happier, and to experience marital love.
Just because they are spiritual and not material in nature doesn’t mean you can’t achieve them by practical methods.
Paul and his clients put aside the problems and issues when they came to him. He says, and it is true forever, that if you work on the foundational construct of your marriage, learn and apply, the problems and issues become the daily “stuff” of life, not overwhelming. And the past issues are seen as ‘what got you to find us.’ Work on what can be changed; the future.
Either course provides Everything you will ever need to completely rehabilitate your marriage. It will never slip backward again.
1. Stop the sliding – Within weeks, sometimes only days, what you learn and apply will begin transforming your marriage.
2. Shift into calmness – In mere days, sometimes hours, what you learn and apply will bring you to a better place.
3. Empower you – From the first video classes you will see how methodical and common-sensible our process is.
4. Support you – Our easily accessible (email) marriage counselors will teach and encourage you every step of the way
Our methodical process in the courses are the ultimate marriage-saver
For marriages that are merely “stumbling”, our YouTube channel and articles, and writing to our counselors, all free, have proven to be a Godsend.
The next level of marriage help that has saved tens of thousands of marriages is our books, Breaking The Cycle and Lessons For a Happy Marriage. But if you are slipping daily, if you fear the marriage is not going in the right direction and you need serious help then the course is the right choice for you.
Our courses are super affordable
Our base price may not be within easy reach for everyone and that’s why we have payment plans that reduce the cost to less than $10 a week (billed monthly). Also, our TMF marriage counselors offer contact with our members free of charge.
Signing up for our “strongest medicine”, the courses for men and women, begins you on a 3-day free trial. Then, you can pay the very reasonable fee all at once, or split your payments for 11 months, to less than $10 a week (choose when you sign up).effectiveness.
If yo have any questions at all you can reach out to us. If you have a counseling question
In other words, our process is for you to become to happy. That is our first order of business in the courses. Showing you the truth, that when you ‘improve’, and you shall, your spouse will also, they can’t help but respond to your love and happiness. A new positive cycle replaces the old destructive ones that cause so much pain and agony.
Our process methodically, like mathematics or physics, changes the negative trends into a positive cycle. It is common sense. When one learns to master their emotions, smile all the time with inner happiness, and also learns the basics of creating love in the relationship It empowers both. Given proper guidance with communication and other marriage enhancing tools means lifting your relationship to you connecting on a far deeper level where marriage is supposed to happen, love. Understanding how to nurture true, unconditional love our clients are not only able to resolve the few problems that may sneak in but one learns to gracefully navigate challenges with inner peace, calmness, and of course, love.
As human beings, we are endowed with great gifts and incredible tools. There is no better vehicle in life than marriage to experience the happiness and all-fulfilling love that was intended for us. Now, you just need to learn how.
By lifting you, the individual, our unique system works!
The fact is that neither you nor your spouse ever properly learned about marriage. Unless you consider movies and sitcoms rational sources of marital education.
So, putting all blame aside regardless of what anyone’s “infractions” are or were, no matter how deep the hole you have fallen into. You can take charge of your future. You can learn and apply the knowledge that will change EVERYTHING! You can do much better than just save your marriage.
By learning how marriage works, how you and your spouse work, plus getting the right tools and guidance, you’ll have the love and happiness that comes as a natural result of living in a harmoniously run marriage, period. (As an added benefit you will find that nearly everything you learn also applies to all your relationships with friends, family, and business, and other associates).
The “learn as you go” technique you relied on for your marriage, and the “common knowledge” found in articles, books, therapy sessions and youtube videos other than Paul’s doesn’t work because societal standards for marriage don’t meet our innate needs for love, real love.
Our system works, perfectly. It is comprehensive yet simple to understand so you can apply what you learn to your marriage as you progress. Paul begins with what everyone can agree are basic essential premises of our need for love and happiness and sets them as the immediate goals. He specified the principles and common sense ideas for marriage that work for us, not against us. Then he used a combination of time-tested methods and special techniques he created himself, such as the SEW technique for individuals to lift their marriages out of the holes (of despair) their marriages had fallen into. The basics have never changed in the over 20 years he used them because they are built upon universal principles that never change, and never get old-fashioned.
Working with thousands of people who are just like you we have both revised some and made slight changes in other recommendations within the courses to help individuals gain greater successful results, faster. But the principles and our process works and always will because we humans all want the same two things, love, and happiness.
TMF was founded as a non-profit organization, with a mission to end marital suffering and divorce by spreading our revolutionary system around the world. Our clients come from over 45 countries. Don’t suffer or feel fear another day. Read about our system below, and let’s get started making you happy again.
Our specially trained counselors help with any question as you progress through either the women’s or men’s course.
“I want your program because after watching Paul’s youtube videos I can say his approach to marriage completely resonates with me.”
"You were literally our last chance. My husband didn't want to go to counseling or talk or anything. The system really worked for us. It didn't take very long, and I hardly needed your help. But you REALLY helped when I really needed encouragement. Thank you, thank you, thank you."
Sharon P. | New York, NYYes, however, we do not recommend people sign up their spouse without their knowledge or interest.
Our most successful, step-by-step program is specifically designed for you to use as an individual to begin the healing and refreshing process without requiring your partner to also do their program.
Over the past 15 years, about half of spouses also sign up, though not always right away.
Even though your intentions are probably wonderful, it is best to not sign up your spouse unless they have expressly asked. In a relatively short period, they will certainly notice big changes in you. Seeing you become a happier person is what will inspire them to want to participate in improving the marriage with you.
Your spouse can sign up for only $249.95 anytime, whether that is today, in a month, a year, or even 5 or 10 years from now.
To add your spouse, buy either individual course above. After signing up, you will have the option to add your spouse for the discounted rate. The option to upgrade will be available to you at any time on your member dashboard.
Over the years, we have seen some true miracles happen. Many of our clients had already sought advice from a long line of ineffective counselors. Others had been turned away by counselors because their problems seemed too difficult. Yet, in the end, they were able to save their marriage with our methods. We have helped couples in all of the following situations and more:
Usually we can help couples that other professionals can’t or won’t help. However there are some unfortunate circumstances in which even we cannot help:
1) If there is physical abuse.
If you or your children are in danger, we do not recommend you stay in the home. Get away from the abuser and into a safe environment. However, we have seen couples move back in together when it was safe to do so.
2) If you or your spouse is abusing drugs or alcohol.
Realize that chronic abuse of any substance is never good when you want to make positive changes. Dealing with the tensions in your marriage is already difficult enough without the added burdensome effects caused by drugs and alcohol. Even in this situation, our system will certainly be beneficial for your marriage, but please seek professional help to address the substance abuse.
3) If your wife has left the home and is involved with another man.
We have not been able to save marriages in this situation. It is different if the husband leaves due to a different motivation driving the separation. Even after they had been living with a younger woman for months, we’ve seen wives who were determined to save their marriage be able to reconcile with their husbands. However, when women leave, they usually leave “with their heart”. Men, if this is your situation, our system might help you interact more positively with her and your children, but sadly we cannot offer hope for a full recovery. Please read the Men’s FAQ for more information.
In all other circumstances, we can help.
To you, the problems you are facing may seem huge and pretty complex, but in our experience they are usually easily resolvable if you know what to fix and how to fix it. If you focus on the symptoms (i.e. the cheating or fighting), you will never resolve the underlying, real problems and will not be able to make progress in healing the marriage.
If you have any questions about your unique situation, feel free to contact our counselors.
Most people experience individual results in days. Certain marriage improvements might take from days to weeks, and difficult cases can take longer. Once you are out of the danger zone, your marriage will continue to improve from there. Many of our clients tell us that even years later their marriages are still getting better day after day.Our courses are delivered over a period of two months. Every week you’ll receive new lessons for you to study and practice in your marriage. Just follow the course, apply the principles, and you’ll see for yourself within the first two months that our system is working, though usually you’ll notice a dramatic shift in the first week. Our 30 day guarantee covers you in case you are not satisfied.The structure of our course was designed by our founder Paul Friedman, who personally trained hundreds of clients. He stresses the fact that there are some key lessons such as learning the S.E.W. technique and using it every day in your marriage in order to bring about a permanent recovery.We constantly receive emails from students who really took the system seriously. After starting the course, they learned the S.E.W. technique and the new concepts and methods of thinking, then applied these to all aspects of their lives. Often they write to us asking questions like, ‘My husband says he likes the new me, and so do I. I’m happier than I’ve ever been, but how can I be sure it will last? How do I convince him I’ve changed?’Opening your eyes is the first big step. Establishing new habits is next, and we assure you that if you stick with it, your marriage will permanently change. Your spouse will be convinced over time and, more often than not, will join you in making improvements.
Yes, absolutely. This is what makes our system so unique. Once you understand why marriages succeed or fail, and study the principles we teach, you’ll see for yourself that they make perfect sense.
Even if only one of you is willing to learn and apply these principles (regardless of who committed the errors), that partner will definitely still enjoy the benefits of an incredible marriage. Time and time again, we see that when one spouse starts taking the course, fighting stops, peace descends on the home, our student becomes happier than ever, and the spouse starts wondering what happened.
The improvement is so remarkable that the spouse often becomes interested in learning how he or she can participate in the process too.
We’ve had cases in which a husband left the home to move in with a younger woman. The wife, however, was not willing to give up, so she took the course, eliminated all fighting and negative interactions with her husband, forgave and loved him (a tough pill to swallow, for sure, but her goal was to have a happy marriage, not to blame her spouse) and after several months he moved back home. They rebuilt a wonderful marriage from that point on. We can’t promise results like this to everyone, but we have seen some amazing miracles.
Many of our clients come to us with this question. But you already know from your own experience that you can’t change others and people only truly change when they make the effort themselves.
The only way to improve your spouse’s behavior that we have seen consistently work is the following:
Very often when a spouse makes a mistake, your impulse to react negatively is strong. Your reaction is nearly as destructive for your marriage as the initial mistake, because it perpetuates a cycle of negative reactions (fighting, giving cold shoulders, yelling, etc). Surely you’ve already seen this happen, over and over again in your marriage.
We have found a way to break this cycle and we teach how to do that in our system. Learning this is essential for a happy marriage.
You must learn to stop the impulse that drives your negative reactions. Once you have mastered this, then you will be able to respond with love and wisdom whenever your spouse makes a mistake. We do not teach you to become a doormat. Instead, we teach you how to respond from an empowered place where you can choose the action that is best for your marriage, rather than responding from a place of feeling hurt, upset, or feeling like a victim.
When you have changed your own attitudes and behaviors, you will then see a marked improvement in how your spouse reacts to you. When you respond only with love, it’s very hard for him or her to put up a fight or to intentionally continue making mistakes.
The Marriage Foundation is not affiliated with any other organization, religious or otherwise. We have clients in over 45 different countries who are followers of all faiths or atheists. We have clients referred to us by pastors, rabbis, and other religious leaders who have reviewed our material. Our principles, books and courses are practical, not religious and work in all religious, spiritual, and atheist marriages.
Here is a summary of the “spiritual” tenets discussed in our system:
No one can deny that we have a consciousness. Religious circles call this a soul, but it’s the same thing.
Marriage counseling, based in western psychology, begins with the premise that we are an organism: a body and brain that has developed consciousness as a result of its chemical processes.
Our courses are based in eastern psychology, which begins with the premise that we are a consciousness that possesses a body and mind. Evolution isn’t denied, but our starting point is that our essence is consciousness inhabiting biology, not just a product of physical, biological processes.
How we got here is for religions to decide. It’s not important to us unless it is useful for your marriage. However, the fundamental difference in marriage-help solutions derives from the question of what we are, which is critically important for your marriage.
If you are a body, then that implies that your consciousness is a perpetual victim of the emotions and habits that drive 90% or more of your actions. This basically means that you have no control over your life and that love is just a chemical that comes and goes solely as a response to outward stimuli or inward chemical reactions.
However if you are a consciousness then although most of our actions are still driven by emotions and habits, we can separate ourselves from them because we are not ‘them’. We own them as possessions. You can compare habits and emotions to wild horses driving our chariot. If in our whole life, we’ve never taken control of the reins, the horses will fight and pull in different directions. However, with the right process and patience, we can learn to rein them in.
By regarding humans as a consciousness or a soul, marriage becomes a union between souls seeking to exchange Love, rather than a union between organisms seeking to experience chemical highs.
In our system the words ‘consciousness’ and ‘soul’, and ‘God’ and ‘Love’ are interchange. However, we don’t preach any dogma. Everything we teach can be proven through your own experience, in your own life.
We maintain that trying to fix your marriage without exercising any control over your emotions, mind, and expressions is futile. So believing that you are just an organism permanently and hopelessly subject to chemistry and outward stimuli will never allow you or your spouse to make changes and improve your marriage.
However, approaching your marriage as a ‘spiritual union’ between two ‘consciousnesses’ has proven to be far more effective than traditional marriage counseling. It provides a useful conceptual model even atheists can accept. This means we are beings who love naturally but its expression is blocked by bad mental habits like yelling, criticizing, and other negative emotional reactions. Once we learn to control those reactions, our natural love can flow freely. Even love itself becomes an energetic force, rather than just the chemicals in the body.
Which conceptual model resonates most profoundly with you? Are you the result of a chemical reaction; an organism entirely subject to your own biology and not responsible for your own behavior? Or are you a consciousness with free will that has the ability and responsibility to manage your own emotions and mind so you can freely love your spouse? If you are at least comfortable working within this latter conceptual model, then you’ll have no problem using our system.
If you want a happy marriage, give our approach a shot. We can show you how to have an incredibly happy marriage, regardless of your religious beliefs.
Feel free to contact one of our counselors if you would like to discuss this topic further.
The Marriage Foundation was established in California in 2009 as a 501(c)(3) educational non-profit organization. We are registered as Global Foundation For Marriage, dba The Marriage Foundation.
From 2003 onward, prior to founding the organization, Paul Friedman had already been developing and testing his marriage-saving material in his private practice. He felt it necessary to establish the foundation so that it would be possible to bring people from all over the world into contact with this much needed methodology.
If you would like to participate in growing our cause and helping marriages worldwide, the best way is to purchase our books or courses and improve your own marriage. By living an ideal example for your kids and others to see, you will leave a lasting impact on society. Other ways to support the foundation are by sharing our social media posts, recommending us to your friends, or by providing a tax-deductible donation, all of which help tremendously.